July 6, 2014 § Leave a comment
“I am reading Call Me By Your Name by André Aciman.
Wonderful to read in summer. Reading, I am reminded of how I have longed to be male, as a child, innocently — like my father — later, like my brother, and later again, still, the men I admired. Loving men, so much, their beauty — the hard lines and their hands, shoulders, everything sensitive and private, the faces and legs and beautifully haired limbs. I loved how men and boys were able to behave and talk and their intelligence, some, a surer thing, and charm, … an ability for indifference or removal I sense perhaps fewer women are capable of. But perhaps that is rubbish. I loved men so much I wished to be man (not to change from what I am but to be naturally so), to love men.”
(from an e-mail)